It's driving me crazy. Converting around 1%.

Of course I'm biased and think the copy's pretty good.

What am I doing wrong?

Here's the site:
Catch Them Cheating - How To Catch A Cheating Lover Guaranteed

I've already tested pricing, and the best converting price
is the price it's at now.

Any ideas?

Thanks!
Christina

My feeling is that while many people may be interested in such a title, when push comes to shove-- they don't want to know. And that's where they leave it.

They think of the emotional and financial stress of what a break-up can cost, not to mention that someone is going to end up alone, and I just don't think many can pull the trigger and order the product.

Not to disregard what Michael has already said, I do believe you can still improve your conversion rate on this, but I would do it by creating a strong story-line.

The copy's not too bad, but here's my take...

Get away from the traditional copywriting template/format as this sales page looks like too many others... this little diamond seems to have lost its luster as of late.

If you go the story route, make it juicy, make it emotionally charged, but most of all, make it totally believable and I know you'll do much better with your conversion.

I would set up a series of autoresponders to go along with this one as well and keep the story alive.

PS - Dig deep and research who your target market is on this one.
I would start with age group and sex, then write to that market.

PPS - Michael does have a good point and many couples have too much to lose (kids, too much time and money invested), but I'm willing to bet this is more on the older age group side of this market and may not effect younger couples as much.

IOW - perhaps your story line should go after the younger, "less time invested" crowd. This might really be worth the research involved.

I hope this is helpful and I wish you the best!

Hi Christina,

I think I know what the problem is. It's your headline. And Michael's right (as usual.) No one really "wants" to catch their cheating lover but ... if you were to say something like this in your headline:

"If You Even Suspect Your Spouse or Lover Is Cheating On You ... You Absolutely Must Read This!"

This kind of headline evokes empathy instead of the cold prying people may feel when they think about investigating a cheating partner.

The key word is "suspect." Try it.

-- Rachel

Nice Headline, Rachel.

She might even try something that creates suspicion. Something like this...

Hi Christina,

Looks like you put a lot of heart and soul into that copy and it shows. Great idea and there's a lot of information in the letter.

I agree with all the previous comments. I'd like to go through it all but there are four overriding issues that must be fixed.

1. Your story is non-existent. In fact you tell them right near the top, "I've been there. More times than I care to admit to be honest with you." That's not good. Right off you sound like you're hiding something. Worse off if you do tell them it can make it sound like you're weak so your story had better be something like, "He screwed me over, I found out using the secrets in my book and I came out stronger than I was while in the relationship."

2. As others have said, the headline is weak. It makes a huge assumption, that the reader just wants to catch their lover cheating. That's more scary than enticing. What's the end game? Breakup, fix it or live with it? The headline should address the outcome not the vehicle that gets them there.

3. You're trying to reach too many people. It's written for men and women and that's tough because your entire copy has to not tick off the other sex and I found several statements that could easily offend your readers.

4. This one is huge. Because you're trying to reach both sexes there's no villain. You can't say, "If you're a man you're like this. If you're a woman you're like this." because that leaves this other person who they're supposed to hate. That's one person too many. I'd rewrite it and target men or women. That means taking out all the general statements (them, those, we, they) and speak like there's just you and one reader (a woman or man).

If you really are trying to reach both then make two letters and get them to each. If you have to put two links on your landing page, "For Men" and "For Women".

I hope that helps.

I totally agree with what Kawika has already stated.

The only way to do this is by giving the full story to them straight up. Don't hold back. You've undoubtedly got a real, tragic story to tell and you're not proving anything to them by holding back. Give it to them with both barrels.

The more you reveal... the more believable it will be... the more rapport and trust you will build with your intended audience!

Well said Stephen. I was struggling trying to explain it and you nailed it.

Reader's want the writer to spill their guts out, hold nothing back. And you're right, it's about building rapport.

In fact the number is a huge credibility builder.

Is it 10, 20, 50? The more the better. Most people have only been through that a few times if at all. They'll listen to someone who has lived in the trenches and come out the other side exactly where they want to be.

Cheers

can you get any ideas from
Cheaters.com - Cheaters

What makes people call them?

Personally, I can't understand why someone would want the world to know their personal business. If my girl was cheating on me, I would say "hey, it was nice while it lasted, now it's time to move on". I would not call the tv show and let the world know about it.

Excellent

Definitely gave me some things to think about.

What do you think of me leaving my copy the way
it is now, but sending them to "my story" first?

In other words:

Squeeze > My Story > Revised Salesletter

I personally feel that the copy is long enough as
it is. And I already have my "story" written inside of
the product itself. Which turns out to be another 1500
words added to the salesletter now.

So, I'm thinking that if I have a "my story" pre-salesletter
page, that might break down the copy a little.

What do you think?

Also, the reason why I chose to write to both male and
female was because I assumed. I assumed that if I did
one or the other, I'd be leaving money on the table.

So, I do like the idea of links to both on the landing page.

Huge downfall to that...

I now have to rewrite the salesletter I have now to target
one gender, and write a completely NEW salesletter for
the other.

And writing copy is draining for me as I have no experience
or skill. So it takes me twice as long.

This salesletter was the first I've ever written.

So, lessons learned thus far:

1) No one "wants" to know. So I need to overcome that
objective relatively soon. Preferably in the headline.

2) Target one gender only (unless you let the visitors
choose, which leads to a more targeted salesletter)

3) Stories sell. And I knew this, but I always have this
"WIIFM" mentality, and while the visitor does feel engaged, I
fear them saying "So What! This is about ME... NOT YOU!"

Anything else I'm missing?

Thanks,
Christina