Would anyone please give me a hand with my sales copy?

I have been trying for months to nail this sucker. I have taken and applied advice from a bunch of forums... i have used various headlines... copy... colors... prices.

I make some sales then it grows deathly quiet for days or weeks...

What am i missing? Is it simple tweaks or do i have to start over?

I am selling an eBook on overcoming fear and anxiety.

I am using a split tester with 2 index pages (the copy is pretty much the same with different headlines)

Any and all advice would be GREATLY appreciated...

http://www.easeoutoffear.com/page1.htm
http://www.easeoutoffear.com/page2.htm

Thank-you so much,

when you say it grows deathly quiet after a few sales, do you mean no traffic conversion?

Or no traffic?

Hi Suzanne, I mean sales conversions... my traffic is fairly consistent and growing slowly. Thanks for the reply.

I haven't looked at the page but if your sales die off suddenly and you haven't changed the copy...

I'd look for a change in traffic. You're getting steady people but are they all the right people? Or do you have spurts of traffic that are good, while most of it sucks? Or...

I'll use a true story to illustrate...

A client came to me after the sales letter I wrote him had been kicking ass for year... He said, "I don't know what happened. The conversion has tanked. Used to convert day in and day out at around 4%. Now I'm lucky if I can break 1%.

I told him to look at his traffic and get back to me. He did and found out that a few of his new clickbank affiliates were spammers, sending him junk traffic. He dropped them and voila... back to 4%.

Hi Suzanne, I mean sales conversions... my traffic is fairly consistent and growing slowly. Thanks for the reply.

Hi Vin, even when i get sales I'm lucky to be converting at 1%... the dead spots are even lower... I'm pretty sure it's the copy.

So you decided not to go with the graphics Mr. Subtle used in this thread? Dang.

I like the second page better because it doesn't open with that long story in italics. Maybe you could add more subheads throughout and make sure the subheads are pithy. I only gave it a quick read but didn't see that you said anything about how your product differs from others. Your offer could be stronger too.

The design is good. I'd love to see an anxiety-ridden Toon in the header, however.

--Anita

Hi Mark,

Just took a quick peep. I would revise your strategy to the following: Squeeze page offering free report or email course followed by your sales letter.

As it stands now, there's nothing very compelling about your sales letter. Sure, everyone wants to get rid of fear and anxiety, but that message is so saturated that most will shrug it off as inconsequential.

But, if you offer something info worthy ... you can get your foot in the door.

My proverbial 2 cents.

-- Rachel

Mark

Here is how I believe your target audience is seeing this:

The Internet is saturated with people who claim they have natural cures to complicated problems. A lot of it is garbage.

I forget if we had this dialogue before but I'll say it again. Your biggest challenge is the credibility factor and some sort of credential.

Why should I believe you over all the other 8 million making their own claim?

I am going to guess that's the #1 reason your traffic doesn't convert.

What Rachel suggests could help somewhat with credibility if you do it right.

But everything in your letter needs to speak to the credibility factor.

And credibility always falls back on what you offer.

Telling me that you have some technique with some vague steps does nothing to convince me. It sounds thin...

Your letter is vague and it lacks credibility.

In my opinion, you really need to address that.

Excellent reply Suzanne.

You've earned yourself some positive rep for that one.