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  #11 (permalink) Old
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Default 04-09-2006, 09:26 AM

Andrew,
Are you related to David Cavanagh in any way?
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  #12 (permalink) Old
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Default 04-09-2006, 03:00 PM

Getting back to the copy, I would try something like this for the subheads and headline:

Attention: This might be your last opportunity to hear FREE audio samples of Gary Kraftsow speaking LIVE at his exclusive Viniyoga training course...

Western World's Leading Viniyoga Instructor Spill His Guts and Reveals Healing and Transformation Techniques That You Can Use To Become A Highly Qualified, "Fully Certified" Viniyoga Trainer

... By using these simplified techniques, you can now become a master Viniyoga Instructor with only a few weeks of study!
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  #13 (permalink) Old
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Default 04-09-2006, 06:11 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by primoquest
Getting back to the copy, I would try something like this for the subheads and headline:

Attention: This might be your last opportunity to hear FREE audio samples of Gary Kraftsow speaking LIVE at his exclusive Viniyoga training course...

Western World's Leading Viniyoga Instructor Spill His Guts and Reveals Healing and Transformation Techniques That You Can Use To Become A Highly Qualified, "Fully Certified" Viniyoga Trainer

... By using these simplified techniques, you can now become a master Viniyoga Instructor with only a few weeks of study!
Exactly the view I had in mind.

Familiar, but not speaking just to those who would eat a piece of his gum after he threw it in the dirt.
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  #14 (permalink) Old
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Default 04-09-2006, 06:32 PM

Quote:
Familiar, but not speaking just to those who would eat a piece of his gum after he threw it in the dirt.
Hahaha -- good one Sky, but it brought back some sad memories of my childhood

When I was a young child, we were so poor that I actually would chew gum that one of my friend threw out onto the snow...

-- now that's "poor"
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Default 04-09-2006, 07:23 PM

Thank you again.


Taking it to the next level for this organization is simply having a sales page to save them time on the phone and with emails from prospects who already have a serious interest in Gary's work and are already VERY serious about their yoga.

This sales letter is NOT for newbies - we have other strategies for them.

I do really appreciate your feedback though.

Kindest regards,
Andrew Cavanagh
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Default 04-09-2006, 07:26 PM

If they don't already have tremendous respect for Gary and his work they don't belong at this training.

The gum analogy is very funny but inappropriate.
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  #17 (permalink) Old
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Default 04-09-2006, 07:29 PM

Also promoting "only a few weeks of study" is likely to put this market off.

They are pretty fanatical and as it was we were unsure as to whether to even mention Gary's 6 year courses of the past.

Apparently people have felt robbed that they only get eight weeks instead of six years!!

Again knowing your market.
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  #18 (permalink) Old
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Default 04-09-2006, 07:33 PM

Oh and David Cavanagh is not related to me as far as I know although we have met.

If find the question quite funny because I get it a LOT in internet marketing circles.

I have to explain to them that the question is the wrong way round.

In Australia I appear on 40 radio stations across the country and have at least a small profile.

No one in the 'real world' knows who David Cavanagh is!

Just kidding David...

Freelance online copywriter(NOT related to David Cavanagh)
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Default When I was young we were so poor... - 04-09-2006, 07:37 PM

"When I was young we were so poor I used to eat gum people threw out on the snow..."

OKAY.

Here's a chance for EVERYBODY.

Hit this forum with them...

"When I was young we were so poor (FILL IN YOUR OWN STORY)..."
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  #20 (permalink) Old
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Default 04-09-2006, 09:50 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cartoonman
Also promoting "only a few weeks of study" is likely to put this market off.

They are pretty fanatical and as it was we were unsure as to whether to even mention Gary's 6 year courses of the past.

Apparently people have felt robbed that they only get eight weeks instead of six years!!

Again knowing your market.
I thought it was very strange being able to become a master in only a few weeks as well. Seems that this type of thing takes years to accomplish, much like martial arts.
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