THE YEAR'S BEST (actual) HEADLINES OF 2006

Something Went Wrong in JetCrash, Expert SaysNo, really?

Police Begin Campaign to RunDown JaywalkersNow that's taking things a bit far!Panda Mating Fails;Veterinarian Takes OverWhat a guy!Miners Refuse to Work
after DeathNo-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-sos!Juvenile Court to TryShooting DefendantSee if that works any better than a fair trial!War Dims Hope for PeaceI can see where it might have that effect!If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly,It May Last AwhileYou think?!


Cold Wave Linked to
TemperaturesWho would have thought!Enfield Couple Slain;PoliceSuspect HomicideThey may be on to something!Red Tape Holds Up New BridgesYou mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!Man Struck By Lightning:Faces Battery ChargeHe probably IS the battery charge!New Study of Obesity Looks forLargerTest GroupWeren't they fat enough?!Astronaut Takes Blame forGas in SpacecraftThat's what he gets for eating those beans!Kids Make Nutritious SnacksTaste like chicken?Local High School DropoutsCut in HalfChainsaw Massacre all over again!Hospitals are Sued by7 Foot DoctorsBoy, are they tall!And the winner is....Typhoon Rips ThroughCemetery; Hundreds DeadDid I read that right?

Thanks a lot, I just spit out my tea. My favorite is the winner (apparently others thought it was the best too)

Peggy